I’m not talking about Chandon, or Cristal…I’m talking about all those bottled up emotions. Yep. Very similar to popping a bottle of champagne. Sometimes it goes smoothly and just as planned but makes a bit of noise, other times the cork goes flying around the kitchen and the champagne starts to overflow beyond your control. Either way, the outcome tends to be pretty eventful.
CONFESSION: I AM A “BOTTLER”
I am not great with communicating emotion, which is why I write. I have learned over the years to store everything safely inside, write about it, and then try as hard as I possibly can to let it go after that. Men like to think that women enjoy arguing (and maybe some of them do) but I do NOT. I do not like the vulnerability of it, and I don’t like how we tend to say things that we don’t really mean.
In fact even the very thought of it makes my stomach churn.
They say that when you’re in an argument and it starts to escalate to just simply take a few deep breaths, or maybe even take a walk. Tell your partner or the person you are arguing with that you are going to take a few moments to yourself. This is supposed to help entirely avoid those rude comments or comebacks you thought of BEFORE YOU SAY THEM. I have found this to work in a lot of situations, we are better at having conversations when we are not so rattled or upset.
CONFESSION: I LIKE TO ESCAPE
I’m not proud of it, and I have never claimed to be. I’m sure it has a lot to do with my past and things I’ve been through, but it doesn’t make it OK. I like to hide away from people when I am struggling. I am first in line to help someone else through a tough time, even people I barely know: but I have a VERY hard time asking for help from others in my own life. My mother and closest friends know this about me…when I’ve continuously flaked on plans or I’m texting instead of returning phone calls: something is going on with me. I am not happy with myself when I behave this way, it is one of my coping mechanisms I have displayed since a younger child, but it is not the one I want to utilize any longer…and you know what?
I don’t have to. That’s the beauty of it.
FACT: YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE YOUR HABITS
I am still a work in progress. I am nowhere near finished improving my habits and my life. I have lived with fears and anxieties of disappointing others for most of my life. I am a sensitive soul, and I often feel things so much more intensely than most which makes me play hide and seek with my feelings at times. The idea that that I have to plant myself in the middle of confrontation or a serious conversation and weather the storm- scares me…but I am learning to do JUST that. In every situation where I have succeeded: I felt stronger, braver, and better about myself as a woman, a mother, and an individual. The power of change and improvement lies within all of us, we just have to learn HOW to use it, make sure we use it correctly, and just simply, START.
What habits are you wanting to work on, cut-out, or change in your life?
If you’re reading this- it’s not too late.